Ok I went.... but I didn't like it

The week has started off with a bang... or should I say I migraine. I have had a migraine for 2 days now which is very unusual for me. I am assuming it is the stress of everything. I am hoping to be able to let it go now if not in the next couple of days.

I met with the parent. Much earlier than expected. She wasn't suppose to come in until 4 and showed up at 815 while I was with another parent. I received a phone call that she was in the counselors office and to come on up. I finished with the good set of parents and headed to the counselor not knowing what I was fully walking into.

Nothing has changed. She is still mad at me... and I am not backing down which I think is pissing her off more. The child is staying in my class, even though I honestly am not so sure she belongs in there, and the parent is going to go to my assistant principal to further complain. I have informed my assistant principal of the issue and she is behind me. Yes behind me. I have to admit it felt awesome to hear her say she wouldn't indulge the parent any more and tell her there are very few options for her. The student can stay in the class, move to my other class, or she can remove her from the AP class and place her in a regular classroom. The parent has already stated she wouldn't move her, but maybe with the assistant principal limiting her she may listen.

On the home front things are good, but we are financially strapped. VERY strapped right now. We are awaiting the arrival financial aid and the tax return to take care of some things we have fallen behind in and get us the the even mark again.

That is somewhat stressful, but K and I are really talking more now and handling things together more than I think we ever have. It has been awesome! We are dealing with things together. Saying its nice isn't defining it well enough. I love it! Love ya babe ;)

2008? Already?

I can't believe its 2008?
It has been forever since I posted, but I thought - whose really reading anyhow?

Well I am back to being the only teacher in the classroom. Which at first actually scared me a bit, it had been a while. Once I got on my feet I was good to go. I sill have some speed bumps to get over, but it is getting better. I have to sit and plan out some long term lessons though. Finding the time I need to do that is tough. I have three different subjects to plan and each of them will take a good chunk of time to plan. I don't think I am doing enough. In fact I was commenting earlier today that I would want the type of teacher I am right now to be teaching my kids. I was told I am being hard on myself. Maybe I am, but I expect more and I am not doing so hot.

The Christmas break has come and gone. Rumor has it that the freshmen get easier to deal with after christmas..... ummm when? How long after Christmas before this mysterious change? I am still waiting. Maybe they are too. I have not fully found myself in this classroom. Does that make sense to anyone? How can it when it isn't crystal clear for myself? Its foggy for me.

Foggy in the sense that I am not me in the classroom. Not a comfortable me. I am not comfortable in the new high school, in this new classroom. I have not been able to make the room mine. It doesn't feel like my classroom.

It isn't for lack of trying. I mean I have begun to paint the walls, to give it a fresh look. I have decorated the door. I have arranged some of the furniture, but I do not feel comfortable in the room. I do not know what I am missing. Vern? Frank? Trading Spaces or maybe while you were out can help me. Then I think - if I can't help me what makes me think they can help. I do not know how to get my feet solidly back on the classroom floor.

It is 2008 and I still do not know which direction I am headed. I hope to find that direction in 2008. I want to be a better teacher, better mother, better wife, better lover, better friend, be a better me. (Losing some weight along the way would be nice to.)

I am thankful for the family I have. We have weathered through some tough times. My immediate family is strong, even with the tugs and pulls we have had; my extended family - a few cousins here and there have really begun to come together too. It has been realy nice to reach out and talk to them. I have a great group of friends. Everywhere from LA. to NE and down to TX. Thanks everyone!

My wife - she's awesome. 6 months today. WOW! We didn't think we would get a ceremony and now look at us. Love ya!

2008 - its underway - can we get time to slow down so we can enjoy it more?